There have been many long years of unanswered prayer in my life. It’s the strangest journey to pray for something good, and hear nothing. I have prayed for healing, for kids, for peace… all noble requests. Yet many times, God seemed to be silent on the side-lines. THIS is where managing my thoughts comes in.

What will I choose to believe about God in the silence?

Will I continually test our relationship with ‘why’ questions?


Can I grow in my ability to release expectations and trust him?

It’s so hard!



The quote above marks a point in my life where I gave up MY agenda.

It was my official surrender.

My mantra of faith.

My declaring to God, “I trust your character more than I trust my circumstances.”

It was me, telling God, he was enough for me.

I made it my prayer of surrender:

I want what YOU want, MORE than I want what I want… AND… more than that, I want YOU.

Hebrews 11:6 became a keystone verse for me. It says, “And without faith living within us it would be impossible to please God. For we come to God in faith knowing that he is real and that he rewards the faith of those who give all their passion and strength into seeking him.

The reward is not necessarily the specific answer to our prayer, but the reward is more of him.

That was the shift I needed to make: go after more of God, releasing everything else.

And you know what…

The weight began to lift.

There is freedom in surrender.

Not one thing had changed in my circumstances, yet everything had changed in me. I was no longer falling apart. I could pray in faith with gratitude, trusting God with the outcome. I fought daily to stay in a place of faith, and God met me there.

How about you? Are you struggling to see God’s plan in your life? Are you fighting from the edge of hopelessness? Are you willing to pray a prayer of surrender, seeking more of God and leaving the results up to him?

My prayer for you today is that you could say this prayer with me:

God, I want what YOU want, MORE than I want what I want… AND more than that… I want YOU.