(more of my cancer story from spring 2009)
I arrived for my first appointment at Stanford Medical Center in a state of awe and disbelief. How had my case been elevated to the point of needing the counsel of possibly the best doctors anywhere? It was like being at the mecca of the medical world. I was grateful and extremely anxious all at the same time.
As Eddie and I maneuvered through the job of parking and looking for the correct building, we located the much needed restrooms. A lady came through the door after me, singing, in a not-so-soft voice. I couldn't believe it. She was belting out the words to an old worship chorus that I knew as a child.
"Peace, peace- wonderful peace.
Coming down from the Father above.
Sweep over my spirit, forever I pray.
In fathomless billows of love."
That moment so ministered to me! God was using her melody to reassure me that He was offering His peace. Genesis 16:13 says, "You are the God who sees me." God was with me and He wanted me to know it.
As I met with the radiation oncologist and his assistant, it was very informative, nerve-wracking, and, at times, physically painful. I found myself singing the song of peace over and over in my mind. God was with me and He was not leaving.
I have a lot of treatment ahead of me which means it will be a continual wrestling match with my nerves. While at times it might appear I'm losing the fight, one thing is certain. God sees me and He will not allow me to be pinned down by fear.
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